You Can’t Teach What You Don’t Live: When God Confronts Compromise on the Way to Your Calling
🚫 Before You Lead Others, Let God Deal with You First
It’s one of the most shocking passages in the Old Testament. God had just called Moses to lead the people of Israel out of slavery—and then in Exodus 4:24, we read:
“At a lodging place on the way, the Lord met Moses and was about to kill him.”
(Exodus 4:24, NIV)
Wait… what?
God almost killed Moses? The very man He had just chosen to confront Pharaoh?
Yes. And the reason is sobering:
Moses was preparing to carry out God’s mission while ignoring God’s covenant.
He hadn’t circumcised his son—something God clearly commanded in Genesis 17 as a sign of His covenant. Whether it was due to fear, cultural compromise, or simple neglect, Moses had not obeyed. And before he could lead others, God met him on the way and said, “Not like this.”
🔥 God Confronts What We Try to Ignore
This moment in scripture isn’t random—it’s deeply personal.
God wasn’t being cruel. He was being holy. He was saying:
You cannot carry My mission while living in quiet compromise.
Before Moses could confront Pharaoh, God had to confront Moses.
Before Moses could lead God’s people into freedom, God had to make sure Moses wasn’t still entangled in disobedience at home.
And if we’re honest, we’ve all been there.
We’ve all felt the pull to press forward while ignoring something the Holy Spirit keeps highlighting.
We’ve all made excuses like, “I’ll deal with that later,” or, “It’s not that big of a deal.”
But God’s mercy often comes in the form of a holy interruption.
🧰 The Happy Kid Toolkit Connection: Obedience Starts With You
If you’ve used the Happy Kid Toolkit, you already know it’s designed to help families take responsibility for their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. It teaches emotional regulation, repentance, healthy communication, and self-awareness in conflict.
But here’s the thing no mat or method can do for you:
- You can’t teach your child to take thoughts captive if you’re still held hostage by your own.
- You can’t call your teen to honesty if you’re avoiding the hard truths in your own heart.
- You can’t disciple others in truth while quietly walking in denial yourself.
The most powerful part of the Toolkit isn’t the Unhappy Kid Triangle or the role cards or even the breakthrough phrases.
It’s the modeling.
It’s you—choosing to live what you teach.
Imagine this:
You’re sitting on the floor with your child, walking through a meltdown.
You gently help them identify their feelings, take a deep breath, and own their behavior.
But ten minutes later, they overhear you snapping at your spouse, muttering under your breath, or scrolling your phone to escape your own emotions.
Kids may listen to what we say. But they mirror what we live.
The Happy Kid Toolkit is not just about helping your kids become emotionally responsible.
It’s about creating a home culture where integrity is normal.
Where repentance is modeled.
Where it’s safe to fail—but it’s also expected that we own it.
So yes, the Toolkit is for them…
But it has to start with you.
Because obedience doesn’t begin on a mat.
It begins in the heart of the one leading the way.
👣 What Does Disobedience Look Like Today?
Modern-Day Compromises We Downplay or Justify
You may not be skipping circumcision like Moses—but compromise is still real.
And today, it’s easier than ever to justify. Let’s make this practical:
🧍♀️ In parenting:
- Yelling at your kids out of frustration, but never apologizing because “they need to learn respect.”
- Prioritizing grades, sports, or appearance over your child’s spiritual life.
- Letting a child emotionally dominate the home while calling it “just a phase.”
- Handing them a screen or snack instead of engaging when they’re dysregulated.
- Avoiding hard conversations about sin, sex, or identity because “they’re not ready yet.”
💡 Obedience in parenting means showing up for the hard, holy heart-work—even when it’s uncomfortable.
💍 In marriage:
- Withholding affection as punishment.
- Pretending things are “fine” while resentment simmers under the surface.
- Gossiping about your spouse to friends or online forums instead of seeking healing.
- Confiding in someone emotionally outside your marriage and calling it “just friendship.”
💡 Obedience in marriage means doing the brave, quiet work of truth, forgiveness, and humility.
📱 In your private life:
- Binging shows that normalize sin and saying “It’s just entertainment.”
- Scrolling instead of surrendering your anxiety to the Lord.
- Gossiping under the disguise of venting or “sharing prayer requests.”
- Ignoring the Holy Spirit’s nudges because you’re too tired to deal with it.
💡 What we excuse in private eventually erodes what we carry in public.
🧑🏫 In ministry or leadership:
- Pouring out to others while neglecting your own soul.
- Preaching forgiveness while holding a grudge.
- Taking on God’s work He never asked you to do—out of fear of being forgotten or replaced.
- Avoiding Sabbath and rest because you’re addicted to being needed.
💡 Spiritual authority flows from personal integrity, not performance.
🧡 A Grace-Filled Warning
Here’s what we learn from Exodus 4:
God doesn’t confront us to condemn us.
He confronts us to realign us. To protect us. To purify the mission He’s entrusted to us.
“You can’t teach what you don’t live.
You can’t walk others into freedom while still chained to compromise.
Obedience isn’t legalism—it’s love in action.”
✍️ Reflect + Realign
Use these questions to invite the Holy Spirit to search your heart today:
- Where am I delaying obedience in my life?
- What compromise am I excusing in the name of survival, ministry, or convenience?
- Is there an area God has been gently confronting, and I’ve been resisting?
Friend, God doesn’t need your perfection—but He does want your surrender.
🎧 Listen to the Episode
This post is based on Episode 82 of The Happy Family Coach Podcast:
👉 You Can’t Teach What You Don’t Live: Why Obedience Starts at Home
🎧 Click embeded player below to listen now
In the episode, I share:
- The full story of Exodus 4:24–26
- Why God nearly killed Moses
- How the Happy Kid Toolkit is tied to spiritual alignment
- Personal stories, reflection questions, and a prayer for breakthrough
It’s a powerful companion to this blog—and I pray it brings both conviction and comfort.
📥 Want to Go Deeper?
📦 Grab the Happy Kid Toolkit – Learn how to model & teach emotional and spiritual alignment at home
🧠 Book a Biblical Counseling or Coaching Session – Let’s walk this out together
🎙️ Subscribe to the Podcast – Weekly episodes to help you grow in faith, family, and freedom
With hope and gratitude
